Dearest Gentle Readers

Extraordinary people, very ordinary behavior

Dearest Gentle Readers,

This is your low-budget version of Lady Whistledown writing to you all after a few busy weeks. Unlike the original Lady Whistledown who writes about the ton, this week’s newsletter from your low-budget version is a letter, or rather, a reminder to myself.

You see, your author had chronically been having trouble living in the present. How should one address this? They should start being present more often is the obvious answer. However, is that a fair ask given that it’s usually a little too late by the time I notice that I had not been present in the moment, but adrift in a world of thoughts that my thought factory has been busy churning out on overtime?

These thoughts are largely of two types - past unhappy events or hypothetical future events. These are thoughts of aspirations that are waiting to be achieved, thoughts about feelings that are waiting to be processed, thoughts about dreams that are waiting to become realities, thoughts about insecurities that are waiting to be overcome and thoughts that are pitying myself for letting these insecurities get the best of me for so many years. But as much as I preach about living in the present and living for the little things that count, I tend to miss a whole bunch of them in my own life. Does this make me a hypocrite? Maybe it does. But maybe, just maybe, it makes me more human - prone to the limitations of one’s mind, body and soul.

But I must ask, if the brain is too busy processing thousands of ifs and buts about all the things that ‘need’ to happen in life, will it ever have enough capacity to at least process the present, let alone ‘live’ it? The only thing my brain seems to be capable enough to process about the present is to take one of two actions – fight or flight. And neither of them is about ‘living’ in the present.

I found the answer from a completely unrelated area - sales!

I was talking to someone at work and they mentioned that “Sales always works on momentum. The same team that performs underwhelmingly will give stellar results once the momentum builds”. It struck a chord, deeper than it was intended to I suppose. I think this philosophy can be applied to our personal growth as well. Maybe this is why people tend to have a 5-7 year period in which their lives ‘peak’. Once I realised this, I started incorporating small changes to my daily routine which built some momentum towards the things that are a priority for me right now. I find myself feeling more confident about the decisions I’m taking and that I am more conscious of the choices I am making, as I am more concerned about losing whatever small momentum that I have been able to build so far. 

Building small steps to create a positive momentum seems to be the only answer I’ve been able to find right now to make myself live in the present more. 

And my gentle readers, this is the little reminder that I wanted to give myself and to you all:

Be kind to yourself for not being able to do everything that you ‘need’ to do. Start small to create that positive momentum and it will evolve into something big.